New Feature: Spank’s Smacks – Spank’s Snacks (a million flavors with only one spoon)

Spank’s Smacks – Spank’s Snacks (a million flavors with only one spoon)

nothingRelevant is proud to present the new series, “Spank’s Smacks – Spank’s Snacks”! Its a  series of food-related topics written and produced by YoSamedy “Old Man McGee” Spanks McSpankenshtein. . 

Old Man McGee is allowing  exclusive access to his secret to a successful Super Bowl Party. Here we go:

Spank’s Smacks – Spank’s Snack’s:  Super Bowl Edition.

What’s on the Menu?

Coffee Table Snacks

  • Swedish Fish candies
  • Butter Scotch candies
  • Jay’s Plain Potato Chips
  • Beer nuts

Cold Appetizers:

  • Smoked sausage and cheese plate
  • Turkey Grabbers – Triscuit, sliced, hand-shredded deli turkey and Dijon mustard
    •  1/2 grape tomatoes*
  • Healthy Grabbers – Wheat Thin, dill pickle and Cream MayNo (Spank’s secret alternate no fat mayonnaise)
  • Boiled Ham Grabbers – Double Triscuit, piccalilli relish, chunk of ham steak and a slice of boiled egg

*(Optional for your more adventurous guests)

Hot Appetizers:

  • Hot Pastrami Grabbers – Rye bread pieces, hot pastrami, thousand island, yellow mustard (sauerkraut optional)
  • Baked Potato Fixers –  Sliced bacon, Velveeta “Liquid Gold” cheese, sour cream, chives and onions (pickles optional)
  • Roast Beef Meatballers – Formed meatball with chopped-up roast beef, ground beef, egg and breadcrumbs – (See “Old Man Spank’s Guide to Eating – Volume 7” for recipe)
  • Hot rice and your choice of shredded meat (Spank’s suggests beef)


  •  Marble Poundcake slices cut into 6 pieces with a teaspoonful of Vanilla Bean Ice Cream, a dollop of frozen Cool Whip on top and blueberries or canned peaches.
  • Black Coffee


  • Canfield’s 50/50 Grapefruit/Lime soda
  • RC Cola
  • Faygo Cream Soda
  • Dr. Brown’s Black Cherry Soda
  • Sweet Vermouth
  • Crown Royal
  • Dry Gin
  • Prune/Banana mix juice
  • Cranberry Juice

And there you have it. Send your wife out to get these items now before it is too late.

Enjoy and stay tuned for more food trends and recipes in our new Spanks Smacks section from the mind and experiences of our new buddy with the many names: YoSamedy “Old Man McGee” Spanks McSpankenshtein.

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